Jeanne Said:

How to change career?

We Answered:

Well you dont say which kind of employment he has been going for so it is hard to suggest ways to get his foot in....unless he is just going for office type jobs...is he getting to interview? If he is then something is wrong in his presentation...if not then his CV's aren't killer.

Why can't he go to college to re-train? Or start his own catering business?

Christy Said:

I am worried about my partners use of cocaine?

We Answered:

This is such a hard situation and I've delt with stuff very similar in my relationship. I met my husband because I used to deal drugs and he bought them off of me, so we have both struggled through drugs and addictions. Through it all I've learned that there is not much YOU can do to help him. Ultimately you can help him realize that he needs to quit, but that is about it. Drug addictions are serious things and cannot be overcome unless the person themselves makes the choice to quit once and for all.

Just try and talk with him and point out things that might make him want to quit. Tell him you are willing to do anything it takes to stay with him, but you want to help him through this. It is important to tell him also that you will be with him even if he continues to do drugs (even if it may not be true) because then he will probably just lie more and more to you about hiim using. Try and make him feel okay with telling you the truth about him using, you can do this possibly by not getting upset when he does tell you he used?? Because if you get upset everytime he tells you, why is he going to tell you in the future?

I want you (and your boyfriend) to understand that quitting is also a process and you have to be supportive through everything!! This is supporting everything including his choice to use. You need to respect his choices and the only thing you really can do is let him know how you feel and try and point out to him how important it is for him to quit. If YOU choose eventually that he is not going to quit and you don't want to be with him than that is your choice.

Good luck to you, this is sooo hard. I've been completely clean from all drugs for over 2 years now!!! My husband is still smoking weed daily and trying to quit which is still very difficult for him and our relationship.

Georgia Said:

Which one of these do you value the most: Religion, Spirituality, Career, Emotions, Physical Self, Ideology...?

We Answered:

Great question. I am starring. I hate to admit that what I value most is EMOTIONS.

Makes me realize how much UNBALANCE this creates.

Florence Said:

French kissing and teenagers: Health Hazard !! FYI !!!!?

We Answered:

or just get the meningicoccal vaccine, also known as the MCV4 vaccine. Most colleges it require it for admission anyway.

Cheryl Said:

Facing deadly brain cancer with only a few years to live, where can a 28 year old man find happiness?

We Answered:

Need is an attachment that actually repels you from the very thing you are trying to attract. Money, partnership...you are keeping it at a distance from yourself because of this. When you give up story about the illness, you get your power back. You are NOT living when you allow the story of your life to own you. The story is not you. What is you is who you'd rather be in place of that? Could it be that you want to instead fill that space with love? If you do that, then you become love and attract love. Your choice then is to either continue feeling stopped by the illness, or take ownership and be something else in place of that story and live whatever time you have left with real living (however you create it). You will find that you'll see things come your way that had not been coming your way before, because you let go of story (need).

Sharon Said:

Does one partner have the right to decide that no one will have sex after marriage?

We Answered:

No, one partner doesn't have the right to stop the necessary physical intimacy that is a gift of marriage! No hanky panky means that not all is well on the homefront. No way is that normal for a partner to not want to express themselves for such a long period of time.

Sex is the glue that holds a relationship together. It's probably gotten my husband and me through several rough patches of our marriage and I would feel terrible if he did considered me "oversexed" when all I want to do is feel close to him.

True, sexual patterns do change over the course of a lifetime, especially when baby arrives, but they need to work for both people involved. I'd say your partner has definite issues about sexuality--don't want to venture what they are, but they pretty extreme to me.